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  Depression...how to handle it
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   Author  Topic: Depression...how to handle it  (Read 499 times)
Kari Grace
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #15 on: July 20, 2005, 03:27:02 pm »
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I have been through Depression. My ex-boyfriend was abusive, and it was very hard for me psychologically. I got over it, though. I broke up with my boyfriend, and I clung to my friends. I wasn't in serious depression, but ... you know ... little problems like that can sometimes be solved just by being around people you enjoy being around.

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I'm a psychologist at the trauma unit of a major hospital.
Really? I'm going to be a school psychologist. Do you enjoy your job? LOL ... tell me about it. Well, actually, you can just PM me if you'd rather not discuss it on here.
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #16 on: July 20, 2005, 05:57:55 pm »
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Dear Frodomyhero: The only thing I could tell you is: Try to be positive, go out with your family and friends to whatever place you like. You know what? I don't know you in person, but I think you are very sweet person for the way you write in this forum.
Depression is a serious illness, I realized because my ex-boyfriend has it. I tried to help him a lot, but it was very hard. I never saw him again, since 2000. My mom is still keep touch with his mom. Poor lady!! Her life is a tragedy and her son doesn't to cooperate with her. He rejected his medicines and he had been hospitalized a twice this year.
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #17 on: July 26, 2005, 08:18:23 pm »
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That sounds really sad MyFrodo! Poor boy.
I just read this book that totally changed my pessimistic behavior from the last few days, infact from a long time. It's called Easier Than You Think, by Richard Calson. And it's a phenominal book. I felt changed spiritually and in mood even while I was reading it! There's so much advice it gives on how small changes you choose to make can change things in your life in a big way.

One of the best advice I read from it, which definately concerns this topic, is that whether you feel great about life or totally depressed and self-destructive (or inbetween somewhere), depends not on what's going on in outside circumstances, but in your thoughts. Reality happens, but thinking terribly about it and focusing on it in your daily life even when you're away from it does nothing about the situation and only blows the situation to be far worse to you than it is. And the author said that instead of being outside yourself when you're feeling down, like damestelle said, go inside yourself and observe your thoughts. You'd observe them by being interested in them but having detachment, just like a movie. You can be on the edge of your seat in the movie but know that it's not real and it can't harm you. And when you reveal how much self-desctructive and negative thoughts you may have, you can just let them go and start thinking positive thoughts.

There's so much more about stuff in the book, I recommend anyone who has trouble with being stressed out or having real depression to read it. It's so effective. The subtitle says, "because life doesn't have to be so hard".
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #18 on: August 18, 2005, 12:34:04 am »
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To everyone affected by depression:: I'm sorry and I hope you find a way to recover. It is a horrible thing to be afflicted with and really takes a toll on you mentally, physically and the like. Good luck in life to all of you.

My uncle commit suicide over depression, he left behind his wife and young daughter ... suicide is never the answer.
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Laura
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #19 on: August 18, 2005, 08:22:42 am »
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It's when you think about it that it gets you down.  When you think about yourself.  Like a few people have said i think it's a good idea to keep yourself busy so you don't have time for your mind to dwell on your self and the things that are making you depressed.  But i think what Damestelle said is probably one of the best ideas:


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The best advice I have for coping with depression (and this comes from personal experience) is to try and get outside yourself as much as possible.  Get involved with helping other people (ex: volunteering) and you will have less time to think about yourself.

I think that's very good advice and may be a very good way to deal with depression.  I think it could help (actually, i can swear on it that this helps, from personal experience).  Depending on what kind of depression it is and the degree of how it's making you suffer.
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Nijntje
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #20 on: August 18, 2005, 11:01:48 am »
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The best advice I have for coping with depression (and this comes from personal experience) is to try and get outside yourself as much as possible.  Get involved with helping other people (ex: volunteering) and you will have less time to think about yourself.

I think that's very good advice and may be a very good way to deal with depression.  I think it could help (actually, i can swear on it that this helps, from personal experience).  Depending on what kind of depression it is and the degree of how it's making you suffer.

It does really help, I can say from personal experience. I've been depressed the last 3 years, and it was a real tough time for me. Volunteering really helps! Just find something you love. Sport made me feel happy (especially swimming, i actually once heard water gives people a special kind of happiness) Give yourself something to look forward to! (ex: On monday, first aid class - with people who actually liked me-, on tuesday, tv-show i followed, on wednesday, almost weekend!, on thursday, volunteering, and so on) even look forward to the smallest things.

Just another idea: talk about it with other depressed people. Talking does help. Ofcourse you can talk to your relatives or friends too, but when they don't know what it feels like, they have another degree of understanding. Other depressed people understand you much better, and that makes all of you feel much better. Just keep in mind that you don't talk each other more and more depressed. Just talk about your feelings and your thoughts, but avoid subjects that will make you all more down than you already are. Anyway, you could do this by meeting people on internet (like special forums for depressed people) or go to your local health centre (or whatever health things you have in your country) so they can help you with finding people or talkgroups or something like that. Anyway, I could always talk about it with my mom, only she doesn't know what it feels like, but luckely (?) i knew someone who was suffering from it too. My friends ignored me after i suffered from it for a while, but when i felt better i just left them. I don't need friends who don't need me, right?

Next to this, I can only agree with other idea's, like thinking about your thoughts, and keeping yourself busy. Trying to be positive didn't always work for me, but you can try it. What helps is, whenever you feel tears coming up, just throw them out. Cry. Cry whenever you feel you have to (if possible, i'm not going to cry at school), just give in to it and you'll feel much better afterwards.

Some things you shouldn't do: DON'T start drinking loads of alcohol to lose yourself and DON'T start drugs or anything like it. Losing yourself may be an attractive idea, but it will only get you in more trouble, and maybe put you in another depression when you just got out the previous one. And i never recommend medicine. Medicine has for me always been the last way out. Just keep trying everything else to make you feel better, and if it all doesn't work, then you can always come back on the medicines. But medicine isn't healthy, so don't use it if there are alternatives.

Good luck with feeling better!
« Last Edit: August 18, 2005, 11:11:04 am by Nijntje » Report to moderator   Logged

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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #21 on: August 18, 2005, 10:52:32 pm »
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I always do that looking forward to thing. It really helps, not just if you are depressed, but if you just aren't feeling all that great, or yourself.
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Re:Depression...how to handle it
« Reply #22 on: August 23, 2005, 02:27:45 pm »
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Depression...its a label and I agree it shouldnt be used lightly but it is used by everyone as an umbrella for amny many levels of mental health issues.
If youre feeling down...let yourself feel down. Its part of being a human being....society especially in England has this 'keep your chin up' and 'pull yourself together' attitude . Other cultures arent as 'stiff upper lipped.
I find journaling helps me understand myself when Im feeling down especially. I write how Im feeling and explore that feeling and how it affects me try it....it may help. Everyones unique and deals with things in a unique way to them.
Talking also...im new on here and not sure if tyou cansend private messages but if you can and you want to Im here.  x
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