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  Going against the grain....
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   Author  Topic: Going against the grain....  (Read 947 times)
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Going against the grain....
« on: June 28, 2005, 02:11:21 pm »
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It's interesting Elijah's quote about going against the grain.
I've always lived my life like that and for me it hasn't been easy.. as a matter of fact... being an artist is down right tough.. also having the certain opinions I do is not what the "majority" views.. so going against the grain has been my life but a tough way to go.
Has anyone felt the same ?
« Last Edit: July 19, 2005, 12:39:59 am by Miss Hazy » Report to moderator   Logged




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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #1 on: June 28, 2005, 02:25:15 pm »
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lol, i always seem to be the one "going against the grain" my opinions are so much different than the majority... so, yeah, i know how that is. Some days are better than others. ... but i figure it'll all be worth it in the end... and, i enjoy being an individual. I don't like blending in with the crowd. 
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #2 on: June 28, 2005, 03:35:34 pm »
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Yup, yup, yup. I definitely know all about that. LOL. I don't really feel like going into it right now.
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #3 on: June 28, 2005, 04:17:48 pm »
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I think I have been "Going against the grain" my whole life, it might be why I don't have many friends now Seeing as they all share similar interests, whereas I don't really...i refuse to just pretend that i like the same films, music, guys and have the same opinions as them just to "fit in".It would be going against everything i believe in (staying true to yourself, etc.etc.).
Another quote that i like is: "You laugh at me because I'm different, i laugh at you because you're all the same." It makes me feel good about being an individual, instead of following the mainstream.
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #4 on: June 28, 2005, 07:32:39 pm »
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I remember when my friends and I went on a school trip to Ottawa last year and we went to some museum, and there were tons of other schools there. Well, being friends with a bunch of other 14-year-olds my friends found a guy they all drolled over. When they showed him to me, I didn't like him all. Fake bleached blonde hair, his whole outfit was from American Eagle, his friends were jocks and looked like complete egotistical jerks, and he looked "soo cool".

When I told my friends I didn't like him (based on appearance) they got all angry and upset at me and made fun of the guys that I like. I felt like crap because I thought "Why don't I find this guy attractive! He looks like the all-around cool guy and I can't like him?!" So, not only did I feel like shit, my friends kept rubbing it in.

After a while of this, I just decided to say "yeah, he's fine looking..." just to please them. That wasn't smart. They then chased him around the whole museum to get a good look at him, and wanted me to go over and talk to him.

See, the thing is...I dislike guys like that. I hate "cool guys" because I've had a bad childhood dealing with kids like that...

Usually I go completely against the grain because I learn more, but this time I just totally lost all my self-respect just to fit in with these girls who swooned over this loser for two hours.

Girls, never do what I did. Because every time you're friends bring it up, you'll hate yourself. 

But, other than that...people say i'm weird. Because i'm not affraid to say whats on my mind, I don't care what people think, and I'm not perfect...so I don't try and act like it.

And I guess because I wear a lot of black. 
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #5 on: June 28, 2005, 07:48:27 pm »
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Quote from: Midnight Show on June 28, 2005, 07:32:39 pm   

I remember when my friends and I went on a school trip to Ottawa last year and we went to some museum, and there were tons of other schools there. Well, being friends with a bunch of other 14-year-olds my friends found a guy they all drolled over. When they showed him to me, I didn't like him all. Fake bleached blonde hair, his whole outfit was from American Eagle, his friends were jocks and looked like complete egotistical jerks, and he looked "soo cool".

When I told my friends I didn't like him (based on appearance) they got all angry and upset at me and made fun of the guys that I like. I felt like crap because I thought "Why don't I find this guy attractive! He looks like the all-around cool guy and I can't like him?!" So, not only did I feel like shit, my friends kept rubbing it in.

After a while of this, I just decided to say "yeah, he's fine looking..." just to please them. That wasn't smart. They then chased him around the whole museum to get a good look at him, and wanted me to go over and talk to him.

See, the thing is...I dislike guys like that. I hate "cool guys" because I've had a bad childhood dealing with kids like that...

Usually I go completely against the grain because I learn more, but this time I just totally lost all my self-respect just to fit in with these girls who swooned over this loser for two hours.

Girls, never do what I did. Because every time you're friends bring it up, you'll hate yourself. 
aww, that sucks... I use to act like that... then i finally just go the point where i'm like, "no, i think this guy is hot... and i think that guy is hot... but that guy is NOT hot." lol, if i'm asked. I like a variety of guys... their looks can be different, but they all have to have a similar attitude.


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And I guess because I wear a lot of black. 

lol, people tell me i'm weird because i wear bright colors, and then hang out with people that wear "punky/gothish" clothing.  course, i did dress kinda punky once just for fun... and then everyone told me i "just didn't look right"
« Last Edit: June 28, 2005, 07:49:22 pm by Jess_B » Report to moderator   Logged

Stop reading my signature. Don't deny it. You're reading it. I can see you. You're giving it the casual little once-over. How rude. Didn't your mother teach you better?
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #6 on: June 28, 2005, 09:05:20 pm »
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Aww, good for you Jess! It's hard situation to go through...especially for someone like me, who doesn't have much self-esteem, and who likes odd guys lol.

Aslong as you're yourself, though. I hang out with everyone...at my school, theres like this goth/punk/metal group...I know some kids in it, I actually liked a guy from that group for along time...*Sigh* and none of my friends approved of him until they found out that he was actually nice. Haha, sucks being a teenager sometimes...lol.

Aww, shame your friends didnt think you could pull off the punk look. It's a hard one to do, goth I find it much easier. 
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #7 on: June 28, 2005, 09:53:48 pm »
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Quote from: Midnight Show on June 28, 2005, 09:05:20 pm   

Aww, good for you Jess! It's hard situation to go through...especially for someone like me, who doesn't have much self-esteem, and who likes odd guys lol.

Aslong as you're yourself, though. I hang out with everyone...at my school, theres like this goth/punk/metal group...I know some kids in it, I actually liked a guy from that group for along time...*Sigh* and none of my friends approved of him until they found out that he was actually nice. Haha, sucks being a teenager sometimes...lol.
lol, i do too! and my friends didn't approve until they decided that i was old enough to decide who i like for myself! He's a "skater dude" omg... he's SOOOO hot. and he gives the best hugs ever! 


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Aww, shame your friends didnt think you could pull off the punk look. It's a hard one to do, goth I find it much easier. 

lol, yeah... i blame it on my blonde hair. They tell me i need to dye it black, but i don't think that would look good. 
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #8 on: June 28, 2005, 10:01:17 pm »
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i'm not really "out there" yet i'm not normal at the same time.....i really dont like the really preppy clothes from like Hollister and American Eagle but i do buy at Delias...its a unique kind of trendy, but not very prep. its just fun, and thats how i like to describe myself. just fun. i can be pretty crazy at times...go screaming down the boardwalk and not care how many people stare at me, its quite fun! so yeah...going against the grain? not so much...being an individual? i like to think so...
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #9 on: June 29, 2005, 12:51:25 am »
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I go against the grain in a lot of aspects in my life, but not constantly. I'm an individual. I like to do things my own way.
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #10 on: June 29, 2005, 03:45:25 pm »
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i'm not really "out there" yet i'm not normal at the same time.....i really dont like the really preppy clothes from like Hollister and American Eagle but i do buy at Delias...its a unique kind of trendy, but not very prep. its just fun, and thats how i like to describe myself. just fun. i can be pretty crazy at times...go screaming down the boardwalk and not care how many people stare at me, its quite fun! so yeah...going against the grain? not so much...being an individual? i like to think so...

LOL ... hrm ... well, I like American Eagle, Hollister, Delias*, Alloy, Vans, and Hot Topic all at the same time. Heh. Sometimes I "punk out" and other times I "prep out" ... but either way, I'm always me. I wear whatever I like, listen to the music I like, believe what I like, and express my opinions the way I want to. It's all very ... me. That's a good thing.
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #11 on: June 29, 2005, 09:32:43 pm »
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I hestitate to post on this because I think I forget the meaning of "going against the grain" because EVERYONE now is "going against the grain".It is now "coo" to have "sleeve" tats or have many holes in your face.When I was fresh out of high school(1984),I got very disparaging looks from people and I wasn't even as punk as I would get then.It's taken a long time for people to not be looked at this way anymore.I used to tell the story of being all punk rock and going to shows and on the way there being spit on numberous times by passers by(mostly college students)and just blowing that off.I was myself and I didn't care about them,they were the "followers".

Man, those were the days I have two kids and I kinda have to fit in now.I still have my t shirts from old shows and all my memories.I know I am still the same old me on the inside but sometimes I crave to be different on the outside.It's just not the time.I still hae my piercings(not recent more like 1980's and early 90's)so there is still some stares but not as many.It's shame that there is no shock value anymore in that.  

So these days I wear just jeans and a t shirt when I go out,no more ripped stuff and eyeliner with dyed hair.All this wasn't easy to pull off either being a person of color in the south.

I will post a pic of myself and my sister back in the day in the pics section in a bit.We were weird! and still are to some extent.
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #12 on: June 29, 2005, 09:44:10 pm »
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lol! I can't wait to see your picture, elflvr04!

You sound a lot like me, lol. Haha.

Speaking of dying hair, I just dyed mine last night. Muaha. 
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #13 on: June 29, 2005, 09:46:44 pm »
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Quote from: elflvr04 on June 29, 2005, 09:32:43 pm   

I will post a pic of myself and my sister back in the day in the pics section in a bit.We were weird! and still are to some extent.

Awesome! I can't wait to see it!
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Re:Gong against the grain....
« Reply #14 on: June 30, 2005, 03:45:51 am »
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It always makes me laugh how everyone seems to think being goth/punk/skater etc is going against the grain. I went through the mosher stage, and then looked around one day and thought 'you know- everyone looks like me. and this isn't me'. Well, it was me- I did like the clothes- but it wasn't because I didn't have the attitude. There are so many people who think 'ooh- I'm wearing black and I've dyed my hair black- hey I'm a goth!' without even knowing what a real goth is. (I'm not saying anyone here isn't a real goth- I don't know you all, so I couldn't say.)

Personally, I wear clothes from anywhere as long as it a) looks nice on me and b) is cheap. So I wear a lot of black t-shirts, 'cos black looks nice on me and they mainly have funny slogans, but I wear normal high street store jeans and coloured tops when i find a nice one. I do my eyeliner however the hell I like- even though I don't draw symbols by my eyes anymore like I used to. That was just because I liked them, not because I called myself goth or anything.

As for the going along with your mates- well, sometimes you have to. Sometimes it's genuine, but others it's not and you just want to fit it. We've all done it- NO-ONE is 100% against the grain. As long as you know the truth though, who gives a damn?
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