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  The A+F agony aunts.
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   Author  Topic: The A+F agony aunts.  (Read 33214 times)
Artanis
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #45 on: April 26, 2005, 12:53:31 pm »
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Laura: what a difficult situation. I'm sorry your friends behave this way, that must be awful.
As I see it, there could be a few reasons why this girls act the way they do, so this is what I think:

1. They are really really jealous, and just wanted to be asked themselves to join.
2. Some of the girls like one of the boys, so they are even more jealous they can't come and are now working it out on the girls who can come!
3. They are afraid to lose you and that's why they ignore  you and not to the others.
4. they are just childish.

What I would do?
Try to talk with them in an adult way, ask why they are behaving like this. Or maybe you can e-mail or chat with them, that's sometimes easier.
It's obvious you don't like it the way it is right now, so try to make this clear to them!

Hope you get it sorted out!

good luck 
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #46 on: April 26, 2005, 01:19:52 pm »
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Thank you Lies. I agree with all of that. They are very childish.

Another friend problem I have is about Sam.

He's a really good guy friend of mine. He hangs about with us all the time and is so good to me and my friends. But then when we're at school he doesn't talk to us as much.

And last Friday when we met up with him and some other guys he literally ignored me and Abi.

This could be the fact that Abi and him have a 'History' and she is back with her ex-boyfriend and he still pines after her and is ignoring us both because he is still sore. Or the face that I've been getting into a couple of 'naughty' things lately. (lets not go into that now) and he doesn't like that.

But the 'naughty' things I have been doing are the same as all my friends do and he treats them all the same. I've emailed him about this but she didn't send me one back. I haven't been at school for 2 days so i may have to talk to him tomorrow.

But one thing that really annoyed me with Sam on Friday was that he ignored me and Abi all night then when a girl we know walked past up he ran up to her and gave her a massive hug saying "Here's my favourite person in the whole wide world." Then Kissed her goodbye.

When Abi and I went he muttered. "Yeah, see you later."

What do you think is up with him?
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #47 on: April 26, 2005, 02:14:15 pm »
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Laura - Do you think maybe he likes you?  One of my guy friends started acting really weird when he liked me.  The weirdest part was that he wouldn't have anything to do with me because he didn't want to seem obvious.  In the end, of course, I confronted him and asked him what in the name of Bob was going on, and I finally got it out of him.  It was very weird at first, yes, but he got over me pretty quickly, and things went back to normal.  Just a couple questions...has he avoided touching you?  Does he avoid eye contact?  and does he ever seem nervous around you?  If so, I would strongly lend the idea that he does like you.  But if you guys are friends, the best thing to do is talk to him.  I know it's not the best advice, but hey.  I'm no Jackie.    Good luck with it! 
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #48 on: April 26, 2005, 02:25:02 pm »
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hey Maria.

I don't think he likes me in that way. It's obvious he's still in love with Abi.

It just pissed me off that he was all 'touchy touchy feely feely' with Sarah and ignored me and Abi. If your going to ignore Abi then fair enough. But why ignore me?

And I hate being pissed at him because I do love him. Clearly as a friend.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #49 on: April 26, 2005, 02:38:55 pm »
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Quote:
because I do love him. Clearly as a friend.


Too bad, I was just going to ask if you liked him , I'm naughty, I know, héhé...

I don't know what to think about Sam actually , maybe he just doesn't want to be with you and your friend because their history and it hasn't anything to do with you?
i don't think 'naughty' things are the reason he isn't talking to you, taht would be a reason dunno for parents or something but not for friends I think

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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #50 on: April 26, 2005, 02:54:59 pm »
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The thing I kind of do like him.

As far as I know I have nothing to do between Sam and Abi. Perhaps he was just pissed off that night. I'm just going to have to talk to him tomorrow unless he emails me.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #51 on: April 27, 2005, 03:46:58 am »
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Laura- your friends dilema- I think they're slightly jealous, but mostly they're afraid of being left behind. I've been in their situation with a good friend a couple of times, and it always worked out for me, but they are going immature to try and recapture the past in the present. That makes no sense but... Try getting Sam to talk to them since he arranged it.

As for Sam himself- I wouldn't be worried that he hardly talks to you at school. he's a lad, and most of them are scared to talk to girl when other lads can see them even when they're pushing 20, so if he's your age it's natural. However, if he's ignoring you and Abi out of school, it could be that he likes either of you, and the other is getting ignore purely for ascosiating with the other (Eg- he likes Abi, so he's ignoring her and has to ignore you 'cos you're hanging around with each other, or vica versa!). Try talk to him on his own, and just ask if you've done anything to upset him, without getting annoyed.

Good luck- hope you have fun camping, it sounds a blast!
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #52 on: April 27, 2005, 02:30:22 pm »
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Cheers Ruth.

All seems OK with the Sam front, he was being his usual self at school. Such as in Drama with the whole jokey kissing, winking thing he was doing with me. So I think it's all cool.

I'll just have to see...

Cheers guys.

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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #53 on: April 27, 2005, 02:39:29 pm »
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Need some instant advice.

Just got home, got in the lift and a guy jumped in to go up to the top floor.  I as I got out on mine he asked me out for a drink.  I said I couldn't tonight (lie) but I took his number.

Shall I just pick up my balls and go for a drink?

Help!! (i'm not used to the whole dating thing!!)
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #54 on: April 27, 2005, 03:34:33 pm »
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ooh exciting

Maybe you could go for a drink but I would go to a public place so when something goes wrong you can flee
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #55 on: April 27, 2005, 03:44:59 pm »
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Jenni, do u know the guy? do you think u 2 are compatable? is he cute? lol... if there's any reason for you to go out w/ this guy... and u have nothing else to do, i say go for it. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OOOOKKAAAYY, my lovely aunts, i have a similar problem. Actually, i have two. Ok, well... the day was all normal and stuff until i got to home room. I walked into home room and was just standing there when my guy friend, Ryan, came in. He's a very quiet person... he's one of those really quiet, but very funny if you can get him to talk kinda person. ... but he never comes over to talk to me on his own... i just always took it as him being naturally quiet... so it was quite a shocker to see him in my home room. I said, "hey. What ya doin' over here?" and he walked over to me... then handed me a note... and walked out. lol... i was lke  . omg, he said that he "obviously wasn't very good at this, but that he'd like me to call him" and he gave me his number. I cannot believe it.... i just... i can't. He's SO quiet... and he's always acted very reserved around me... in fact, i think the most i've talked to him was this past week when i occasionally saw him in the hall. Maybe i flirted too much, i don't know... lol, i said something like, "how come you never talk to me, Ryan? It makes me sad. You're such a heartbreaker" ... or something along those lines. I didn't think anything of it at the time... we were just joking around. ... but then today... i was just blown away. He's a really nice guy, we have a good time hanging out and such... but i've just never thought of him that way, ya know?

Well... the other half of my dramatic life has to do with Jesse. lol, I think he has a girlfriend outside of school... and that's just to name one. lol  I mentioned to him and dustin today about my guy friend asking me out... just to see if it would effect them in any way... i don't think it did. lol. I told them i probly would date him, except i kinda like another guy. and Dustin asked me who it was, and i just shrugged and said, "i don't think he'd care... so there's not really a point in me mentioning it." Well, by pop break... i was tired of it. lol. He came over to talk to Sam... and i was there... i said something to sam after he left about me thinking about just telling him i think he's hot. So her and my other friend went over to tell him. lol, i walked up shortly after they had informed him, and he just kinda pointed at me. i said, "yeah, i think you're hot." You could tell it made him ... i dunno... he acted strange. He like bit his lip, but was smiling, but also kinda shook his head... or tilted it or something. then he walked off... but Sam, my friend, and I had already started another conversation about something else before he had walked off. I don't know what to think of it... i'm not sure what i should do with either situations... Ryan would be so much better accepted by my family... and i think he would be the "better" boyfriend, as far as that goes... but i, for some odd reason, really like Jess. *bangs head*

So... right, there are my problems, aunties. any advice for me?
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #56 on: April 27, 2005, 04:18:02 pm »
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Pff Jess, that's a difficult one .

I guess it'll never hurt someone if you just try out a date with Ryan, right,
He seems like a nice and sweet guy?

and when you think it is obvious Jesse doesn't like you, maybe you should try to go on with your life? Of course, that's easy for me to say , but maybe you should try?

I wouldn't go out with Ryan, just because your parents would like him better though, it has to be your own decision, don't you think?
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #57 on: April 27, 2005, 06:57:14 pm »
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Well, Jess, here's my two cents on the matter.

You've been pining after this Jesse character for so long. And it seems to me that nothing has changed between you. Which leads me to believe that.. maybe it never will (sorry). Plus, you've said before that in order for you to date Jesse, he'd have to totally change to please your family. Somehow he doesn't seem like the type willing to do this for a girl.

In fact, if you want my totally honest opinion, it doesn't seem like Jesse's very nice to girls. He dated one girl for three days, didn't he? Just because he felt like it? And now you say his "outside" girlfriend is "just to name one." Do you really want to date a guy like that? How do you know he'd even be faithful to you? It'd be asking for trouble, in my opinion.

Now.. Ryan.    He sounds sweet! Giving you a note and asking you to call him? Awwww! And it seems like maybe you've flirted with him a little bit, so there must be a least a hint of underlying attraction there somewhere.

As far as him being very quiet and shy, that's most likely (and, actually, you said it is) an exterior thing. I'll bet any money that if you gave him a chance, you'd probably hit it off perfectly. In fact, you two might compliment each other very well. My ex-boyfriend was always very quiet in public; he hated large crowds and parties and such. But once we got to know each other, I can truthfully say he turned into one of the best people I've ever known. He was funny, sweet, and not boring at all. Maybe Ryan is the same way.

But before you make a decision, you've got to figure one thing out: If you agreed to go out with Ryan, would you only be doing it to spite Jesse? Because if you go out with him with Jesse on your mind, that's just totally unfair to this poor guy who got up the balls to ask you out in the first place. And he doesn't deserve that. So think about it.

If you're curious and willing to give Ryan a fair chance, though, I say go for it! It can't hurt anything. And if it doesn't work out, hey, at least you tried. You might be surprised, Jess. Maybe Ryan is just what you need.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #58 on: April 27, 2005, 09:35:36 pm »
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*sigh* i think you're probably right, Flummoxed. (btw, what is your real name? if u don't care to tell me.) I called Ryan... and he was really quiet on the phone too... lol, i talked to him for a while, and then asked him if there was a reason for him giving me that note today. and he said, "yeah, kinda" ... then he just sat there for like five minutes! lol, then he said, "well, this is awkward." and sat there for several more minutes... then asked me if i was doing anything friday. lol... i said i wasn't sure, (which i'm not), and he asked me if i wanted to go the movies or something... well, i said we could wait and see if i had anything going on friday, he said ok, and we hung up. THen i went to church and my friends were like bombarding me about how i should go out with him... and ultamately led to me getting annoyed and a headache. Then after i got home from church, Ryan called back and told me to forget about friday because he got grounded and can't go... and now my friend is telling me she thinks it's because he's afraid of rejection.

And, i'm going to just wait and see. Jesse knows i htink he's hot, if he reacts to that... then, good, he does. if he doesn't, o well, it won't be anything new. I still like him, he's a good guy... and, really, i don't think i'd be a good girlfriend to ryan because i'm not conventional... and i don't even know if i like him that way, but i do know that i DO like jesse that way. So, yes, it would be very unfair to ryan, which is another reason i'm hesitant to go out w/ him... but my friends are freaking pushing for it so hard... and i feel i should at least "give him a chance". *sigh* THe high school drama never ends.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #59 on: April 27, 2005, 09:44:04 pm »
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Nope, the high school drama indeed never ends, Jess. You can call me Manda, by the way (it's Amanda, really, but everyone usually drops that first syllable; too much effort to say, apparently).

Anyhoodles.. maybe you should forego the date with Ryan then. If he'll only get hurt by it, and you already know it, then it wouldn't be very nice at all. Point this out to your friends; tell them you know he'll only get hurt, and that you don't want to do that.

But also, don't forget to keep an open mind about all these crazy boys. You never know when one might show up that might interest you, besides Jesse.

Good luck. I hope you get it figured out, and that it works out for you!
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