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  The A+F agony aunts.
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   Author  Topic: The A+F agony aunts.  (Read 33194 times)
LegolasBuzzgirl
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The A+F agony aunts.
« on: April 18, 2005, 07:33:41 am »
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Welcome to the Agony Aunts!


We know that we all have problems which we need help on, and that the best advice invariably comes from people who have been in similar situations.

So this thread is to turn us all into agony aunts (or uncles- no discrimination) so we can all offer advice, as well as asking for it.

However, recently there has been a problem with sexual issues. Now, we're willing to help with any problems or advice etc regarding sexual stuff, but it's going to have to be by PM. The following members are standing by to give you help in the sex area-

LegolasBuzzgirl (female)
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<*>Epica<*> (female)
Snail(female)
MrFishPillow(male)

« Last Edit: February 13, 2006, 10:22:18 am by LegolasBuzzgirl » Report to moderator   Logged




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eLijAhZpuMpKiNlOvE
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #1 on: April 18, 2005, 07:38:53 am »
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What a great idea. I'm sure Jackie would appriciate this.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2005, 08:29:05 am »
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Yay for Jackie and yay for the new advice thread! Great idea!


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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #3 on: April 18, 2005, 09:12:21 am »
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wait a minute...Jackie left?? I don't come for a few days and I miss everything! 
Thats really sad, but its really good of you guys to set up a tribute thread. I will come here whenever I have a problem 
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #4 on: April 18, 2005, 03:17:30 pm »
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What a good idea! So....anyone want to ask anything?
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2005, 03:53:54 pm »
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This is a great idea.

I'm good at the moment. Just really angry.

Girls are bitches.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2005, 05:08:56 pm »
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Yeah, I can only agree, this is a wonderful idea!
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2005, 05:58:23 pm »
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Well, i'll be ya'll first customers.  lol.

Ok, perhaps some of you have heard me mention this guy in jackie's thread... or other various ones... But i've been trying to get to know this guy that i really like. He's funny, very cute, and just cool to hang around. Well, he likes my friend... and my friend likes someone else. She's told me this multiple times (before she knew i liked him) BUT she continues to string him along! She'll flirt like heck with him during breaks and such... but then be mean to him later. We were talking about it this morning, and i infromed her that he really thinks she likes him (he told me). she was thrilled. She said she just loved stringing him along while stepping on him the whole time... I was telling her how he was telling me he thought this and what not, and she asked me if i had just wanted to reach across and choke him... i said, "no, i wanted to reach across and hug him while saying "awwwww..."" it's so bad! i feel so bad for him... and me... lol, it's all screwed up. But if she doesn't like him, and she knows that i do... why is she screwing with him like this? i don't think she's the type to try to make someone jealous... it's just really... ... annoying. yeah, that's the word.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #8 on: April 18, 2005, 07:03:12 pm »
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Hey Jess_B if you don't mind, I'd like to help you out.

It is possible that your friend actually likes this guy but is afraid to admit it. I can't think of another way of why she would want to hurt him like that. She could also like him but doesn't want to hurt YOUR feelings by letting you know that she likes him. That's just a theory though. I think you should really talk to her and tell her how your feeling. It seems so cliché but it may work. Tell her you really like him. If she's not going to like him back the way he likes her she needs to stop "stringing him along." A guy can like a girl and she doesn't have to return the affection but she doesn't have to hurt his feelings by making him think she may really like him. If she likes him you need to tell her to go for it. If she doesn't tell her to stop hurting a really sweet guy and go for him yourself!

Hope I helped Jess.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2005, 09:20:38 pm »
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Quote from: ShannyBanany on April 18, 2005, 07:03:12 pm   

Hey Jess_B if you don't mind, I'd like to help you out.

It is possible that your friend actually likes this guy but is afraid to admit it. I can't think of another way of why she would want to hurt him like that. She could also like him but doesn't want to hurt YOUR feelings by letting you know that she likes him. That's just a theory though. I think you should really talk to her and tell her how your feeling. It seems so cliché but it may work. Tell her you really like him. If she's not going to like him back the way he likes her she needs to stop "stringing him along." A guy can like a girl and she doesn't have to return the affection but she doesn't have to hurt his feelings by making him think she may really like him. If she likes him you need to tell her to go for it. If she doesn't tell her to stop hurting a really sweet guy and go for him yourself!

Hope I helped Jess.

all of those theories i, myself, have considered as well... I just can't figure it out... lol, unless she just likes the attention. I think that may be what it is... she likes the attention--cause he sure as heck gives her tons. She's tried to give me tips on how to get him and such... lol, and today i just couldn't get over the fact that she doesn't think he's cute. I mean, we had this conversation for like 15 mins... just, "you really don't think he's cute? at all? you REALLY don't think so??" lol, i couldn't believe it. she said he didn't have pretty eyes!! WT...??? he has beautiful eyes... lol, they're blue, i love them. but, i mean, i'm kinda glad she has that opinion... i just wish that flirting for fun was out of the question. 

oh, and thanks, btw. I like to know i'm not the only one that thinks of these types of theories. 
« Last Edit: April 18, 2005, 09:22:23 pm by Jess_B » Report to moderator   Logged

Stop reading my signature. Don't deny it. You're reading it. I can see you. You're giving it the casual little once-over. How rude. Didn't your mother teach you better?
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #10 on: April 18, 2005, 09:32:58 pm »
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You're welcome Jess.

I think you're right though, she could just like the attention. I think over time she'll get bored with him and hopefully quit or unfortunately she could move on to another guy. Maybe, you should be more assertive to let him know your interested in him, not just physically but mentally too. He may end up having a new crush on you.

Good Luck.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #11 on: April 18, 2005, 09:44:56 pm »
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Am I gonna get in trouble for saying what I think?

Jess.. I think it's very insensitive of your friend to string this guy along, insensitive towards him of course since he might get the wrong impression but  more towards you because you are her friend.

She knows you like him but by giving him false impressions, she is diverting all the attention that he could be giving you onto her. You said she gives you tips which is great but what is the point of those tips if she gets all of his attention?

Shanny is right, it could be that she secretly likes him but is afraid to hurt your feelings or that she simply likes the attention. There is no other way of knowing the truth than by talking to her and asking her outright whether she has feelings for him because the current situation is neither going to help your friendship with her nor help you in getting anywhere with that boy.
« Last Edit: April 18, 2005, 09:45:55 pm by CarinaLady » Report to moderator   Logged
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #12 on: April 18, 2005, 10:08:07 pm »
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Geez Jess, so much drama over this guy, eh? Lol. I hate drama like that.

Well, as far as talking to your friend about this.. it sounds like you already have. If you've already had conversations about whether she thinks he's cute, and about him liking her and whatnot, then there's really not anything else to do there. If you confront her about it again, it's not likely that her answers will change.

It doesn't seem to me that she likes him. I think she likes to attention, and the idea of a guy liking her. I mean, come on - you know the feeling you get when a guy likes you. You feel beautiful and funny and all warm inside, whether you like him or not. Maybe your friend really likes this feeling, and isn't willing to give it up.

She could also just really like playing around with this poor guy's heart. Which is cruel, if you ask me. But everyone gets their jollies in a different fashion, I suppose.

My best advice would be to just give it some time. Intense crushes wear off, and maybe she'll get bored leading him on. Either way, there's really not much you can do about it, except keep stressing the fact that you really like him to her. Maybe she'll start to get it.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #13 on: April 19, 2005, 03:43:59 am »
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All the answers above quote mainly what I was going to say.

A tinsy little idea though? It may not work, but it's worth voicing. If you can be absolutly sure that she doesn't like him, then could you get the fact that he likes her to work for you? I mean, if she really doesn't like him, could you get her to help you by having her drop hints when he's around her. Simple stuff like "Oh- Jess looks nice today doesn't she?" or "You and Jess'd make a good couple you know". Might not work, but... you never know. And if she point blank refuses to help you, then you'll know for sure that she does like him.
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Re:The A+F agony aunts.
« Reply #14 on: April 19, 2005, 08:36:25 pm »
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Quote from: CarinaLady on April 18, 2005, 09:44:56 pm   

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Jess.. I think it's very insensitive of your friend to string this guy along, insensitive towards him of course since he might get the wrong impression but  more towards you because you are her friend.
aww... i agree. lol, i agree with most of the stuff that you guys have all said.


Quote:

She knows you like him but by giving him false impressions, she is diverting all the attention that he could be giving you onto her. You said she gives you tips which is great but what is the point of those tips if she gets all of his attention?
That's a very good point... yet, she also likes to ask me to come along when she goes to "bother" him. I usually do... and it's like i'm not even there.


Quote:
I mean, come on - you know the feeling you get when a guy likes you. You feel beautiful and funny and all warm inside, whether you like him or not. Maybe your friend really likes this feeling, and isn't willing to give it up.
I think that's basically what it boils down to, honestly. Lol, yeah, i know that feeling... not very well, and usually i end up being wrong about the guy liking me... but when i feel liked, i like myself much more. and it is fun, especially from him, because he's such a "contact flirt", if ya know what i mean. he'll hug you, hold hands w/ u... he kissed her on various body parts multiple times before... and i think she likes it, because, lol, i know i do... of course, he hasn't touched me in like... a week... but, still.


Quote:
A tinsy little idea though? It may not work, but it's worth voicing. If you can be absolutly sure that she doesn't like him, then could you get the fact that he likes her to work for you? I mean, if she really doesn't like him, could you get her to help you by having her drop hints when he's around her. Simple stuff like "Oh- Jess looks nice today doesn't she?" or "You and Jess'd make a good couple you know". Might not work, but... you never know. And if she point blank refuses to help you, then you'll know for sure that she does like him.
you know, i like that idea. lol, i don't think she'd do it... or if she did, jess would probly say, "jess who?" but i've considered asking her to do that for me... i may if things keep going on like they did today.

Ok, now, since i'm on the topic, i might as well vent a lil, yes? i just about got mad today... i'm one of those kinda ppl where if i get mad, you don't really know it... like Kari will know if i'm mad at someone, herself included, and i might tell the peeps on this board... but other than that, no one knows... lol. well, i ate lunch w/ my friend... and jesse was in our lunch. (lunch is all screwed this week because of the school testing crap) We went over and sat down, and i saw jess up walking around and sitting w/ some other ppl i know. My friend was kinda trying to hide from him... or act like it. After lunch was over, she and i stood in the lunch room, both of us were watching him, but neither would really admit it. When he left, she said, "yes! he didn't see me! i managed to avoid him." then we started to walk away, and she said, "i kinda want to go bother him now... do you want to come with me?" i said, "no, not really. let's just go." she said, "ahh, yeah you do. You think he's fun to look at--"  "o yes, he's very, very fun to look at."  "--come with me. i'll bother him, you look at him."

lol, so i ended up going over there. when we got out there, i was completely and utterly ignored. i mean, sure, i spoke... but i might as well hadn't've. I don't even think Jesse looked at me the entire time i stood there. and my friend pretty much forgot i was there by the time we reached him. I, once again, felt bad for him, though. He hugged her and stuff as soon as he saw her, and asked her to come upstairs with him... and she said no. then he asked her if she wanted him to come with her... and she said no. ... she said she was just going to walk around... but she kept shooting down everything he suggested. So i got mad that she 1)pretending to try to avoid him, but then actually went to see him 2) that she shot him down when he was being very sweet 3) that i was completely and utterly, to the fullest extent, ignored while we stood there... by both of them.  *grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*
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Stop reading my signature. Don't deny it. You're reading it. I can see you. You're giving it the casual little once-over. How rude. Didn't your mother teach you better?
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